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The War Of The Sexes - 2/15/2013

In the past, women, generally speaking, were looked upon as wimps, while warriors, mostly men, were viewed as the dominant sex. Well, men, you need to see that women are no longer willing to play the role of the subservient female. You need to realize that a revolution has begin, and women have changed their tactics. They have discarded their pussycat costumes and are showing their stripes. They are morphing into tigers, who want equal pay, equal rights, and equal say in their relationships with their husbands and in the world. They are no longer willing to take it sitting down. They’re ready to do battle, toe to toe.  In effect, the worm has finally turned, and I, for one,  believe that, long-term, if will be for the better.

Is that the case in every household, business, or corporation? Of course not. But new role models are emerging on a daily basis. Women are no longer content to be secretaries or teachers. Instead, they’re secretaries of state, prime ministers and presidents of countries, companies, and corporations. Women are active in politics, and filling positions on police forces, fire departments, and the military. In many ways, these women are the forerunners in a race for equality for women. At the same time, they’re paying their dues. Frightened men are taking advantage of them, physically, sexually, and monetarily.  But more and more, women are standing up and standing firm. Perhaps too firm. But isn’t that the way a pendulum swings? In the beginning, it starts from one extreme, then shifts to the other, until it eventually evens out.

Going further, let me cite an article by Jennifer Homans, in The New York Times, September 16, 2012, in which she reviewed  The End of Men and the Rise of Women by Hannah Rosin. ‘The end of men’ is not really a title, it’s a sound bite. What Hannah Rosin means is that the revolution feminists have been waiting for is finally here, and that it’s happening now, right before our eyes. Men are losing their grip, patriarchy is crumbling, and we are reaching ‘the end of 200,000 years of human history and the beginning of a new era’, in which women - and womanly skills and traits - are on the rise.”

Similarly, David Brooks, a columnist for The New York Times, wrote an article titled, Men Are Falling Behind, As Women Learn To Adapt. Brooks says, “Women are thriving in the new economic quarter, by being flexible, while men attempt to cling to outdated ideologies. In elementary and high schools, male academic performance is lacking. Boys earn three quarters of the D’s and F’s. By college, men are clearly behind. Only 40% of bachelor’s degrees go to men, along with 40% of master’s degrees.  In 1954, 96% of American men between the ages of 25 and 54 worked. Today, the number is down to 80%... Millions of men are collecting disability. Even worse, many of those who do have jobs are doing poorly, according to Michael Greenstone, of The Hamilton Project. Annual earnings for median prime-age males has dropped by 28% over the past 40 years. Nevertheless, men still dominate the tip-top of the corporate ladder, because many women take off time to raise children. But women lead, or are gaining, everywhere else. Women in their 20's outearn men in their 20's. Twelve of the fifteen fastest growing professions are dominated by women.”

He continues by saying, “Hannah Rosin  reports from working-class Alabama that women are flooding into new jobs and new opportunities - going back to college, pursuing new careers. Meanwhile, men are waiting for the jobs that left and are not ever coming back. They are strangely immune to new options. Rosin is saying that women are adapting to today’s economy with more flexibility and resiliency than men. “Young women today,” she argues, “are more like clean slates, having abandoned both feminist and pre-feminist conceptions. Men still adhere to the masculinity rule, which limits their vision and their movement.”

Both reviews attest to the fact that there are increasing number of women working while men are staying home as house moms. In addition, they’ve grown backbones and learned to ask, “What part of ‘no’ do you not understand?” It’s only the beginning of what I believe will become the norm, as opposed to the exception. After all, it only takes a few snowballs to eventually cause an avalanche. This isn’t just my opinion. It’s the thoughts of an increasing number of authors and experts in this area. All of whom believe that this movement is further along than I am suggesting.

I also suspect that in the near future, we can expect to see increasing incidents of female spousal abuse, because many men are blind to the changes taking place “right before their eyes”, and reluctant to look inward at their own feelings of insufficiency and vulnerability. Consequently, they figuratively speaking, justify and attribute their behavior to their wife’s newly-found “uppity attitudes.” It’s one more effect of the avalanche that men have to take heed of before they are blanketed by and suffocated under future consequences of this “feminist revolution”.

I believe that, in order to avoid a major war of the sexes and to expedite an effective solution, men and women have to recognize that somewhere inside every warrior, is a wimp, who “doth protest too much.” Conversely, inside every wimp is an angry, resentful beast, whose resentments have smoldered for years and which, when eventually unleashed, similar to a stream of molten lava, can destroy everything in its path. Neither can be considered right or wrong. They’re just coping techniques that most men and women learned early in life.

Depending on which role you fill, you have either come to view a warrior as a bully, or a wimp as a loser. The truth be known, however, there is no difference between their emotional dynamics. They are both emotionally insecure, needy individuals, who desperately require recognition, appreciation, and care. In one word, “love” from each other. When men and women come to recognize that fact,  they’ll be far better able to see themselves introspectively and share themselves honestly. As a result, they will come to live with themselves better and have far less difficulty living with each other.

It may be well for men to recall the old expression, “hell has no fury like a woman scorned.” Have women been scorned? You bet. They’ve been left out, put down and treated as secondary citizens. But that’s changing, men. And if you want to avoid being swept aside by virtue of that change, it might be wise to consider joining and working with them, because it’s beginning to appear that there’s no way to beat them.

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